Lesson Recap and Video link

Daughters of God: Listening to the RIGHT Voice Inside of Us

Given by Devon Linn

Sunday, May 12 (Mother's Day)

So this topic today seems to be something the Lord wants us, as sisters in our ward, to discuss, and it has come from multiple promptings. First, I asked the Bishop a couple of months ago if there was anything new he wanted us to focus on for the year, and he told me that he felt really strongly that the sisters in our ward need to remember to try to see themselves the way that the Lord sees them. I mulled that over for awhile and we have planned a few lessons and activities around that general theme. But then I prayed for promptings of what we needed to hear during General Conference last month and I suddenly felt really strongly during President Uchtdorf's talk during the Priesthood Session that what he was saying was really really important for all of us to think about. As I went back to re-read what the Bishop had directed me on, I was amazed how exactly they aligned.  

I am going to read the portion of President Uchtdorf's talk that the Spirit struck as me being the most important thing for us all to hear (but since it was given during the Priesthood session, I am taking the liberty of changing all of the "sons and brothers" to "daughters and sisters" since the message is universal):

One title that defines all of us in the most fundamental way is [daughter] of Heavenly Father. No matter what else we are or do in life, we must never forget that we are God’s literal spirit children. We were His children before we came to this world, and we will be His children forevermore. This basic truth should change the way we look at ourselves, our brothers and sisters, and life itself.

Unfortunately, none of us quite lives up to everything that this title implies, “for all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.”

It can be discouraging at times to know what it means to be a [daughter] of God and yet come up short. The adversary likes to take advantage of these feelings. Satan would rather that you define yourself by your sins instead of your divine potential.  [sisters], don’t listen to him.

We have all seen a toddler learn to walk. He takes a small step and totters. He falls. Do we scold such an attempt? Of course not. What father would punish a toddler for stumbling? We encourage, we applaud, and we praise because with every small step, the child is becoming more like his parents.

Now, [sisters], compared to the perfection of God, we mortals are scarcely more than awkward, faltering toddlers. But our loving Heavenly Father wants us to become more like Him, and, dear [sisters], that should be our eternal goal too. God understands that we get there not in an instant but by taking one step at a time.

I do not believe in a God who would set up rules and commandments only to wait for us to fail so He could punish us. I believe in a Heavenly Father who is loving and caring and who rejoices in our every effort to stand tall and walk toward Him. Even when we stumble, He urges us not to be discouraged—never to give up or flee our allotted field of service—but to take courage, find our faith, and keep trying.

2013 April General Conference, Four Titles, Priesthood Session - By  Dieter F. Uchtdorf

So we are HIS DAUGHTERS. We should know what that means, but we often forget to think of ourselves first and foremost as "daughters of God." I think this can be best shown with the example of how we, as women, think and talk about ourselves. One example is how women can become such complete pros at giving disclaimers or excuses over all sorts of things..."this gift isn't perfect...I look awful cause I'm not wearing any mascara...my house isn't clean (when it sure looks it)....I'm the world's worst Visiting Teacher..." even my personal favorite "I shouldn't be allowed to teach this lesson -- I should be sitting there listening to someone else teach it, cause I'm not perfect at this topic yet..." (which obviously doesn't apply to this lesson, since I can't say that NOW that we're talking about it.)

President Uchtdorf gave a perfect example of this habit of women in his talk "Happiness, Your Heritage" (from the Relief Society Broadcast in Sep. 2008).  He explained the differences between how his wife feels when she cooks a perfectly prepared, delicious, beautifully presented meal and yet always has some disclaimer about needing a bit more ginger, or using just one bay leaf next time. President Uchtdorf, on the other hand, feels proud of his cooking when he burns toast or cooks fried eggs extra runny.

Even if you think, "oh, I don't do that" you occasionally do it without even realizing it, whether it's about your house, your clothes, a gift you give, your strengths and weaknesses, or even your thoughts or behavior. But it's not the disclaimers themselves that's the problem -- the root problem is HOW we are seeing and thinking of ourselves and where those voices and thoughts are coming from. 

I think it's important we understand the "why" and look inside our hearts and honestly ask ourselves some questions:

Why do we do this? What makes us feel that we need to focus on the negatives about ourselves?

Answers from class:

• Feeling insecure in ourselves and our strengths
• Fear of Being Judged (and partly, by judging others)
• Feeling less than others because of comparing ourselves unfairly
• Fear of being thought to be imperfect (or feeling guilty that we AREN'T perfect)
• Fear that we aren't as good or loved as others
• We are focused on OUR imperfections, yet only see other's presentable best
• Feelings of our unworthiness, and disappointing the Lord
• Feeling that we have to do everything ourselves, and fear of falling short.

ALL OF THESE COME FROM LISTENING TO THE WRONG VOICE! It is Satan who is making us think and feel these ways, as not good enough, not righteous enough, not worthy enough, not pretty enough, not friendly enough, not enough, enough, ENOUGH!

So we need to ask ourselves another question:

How can we stop listening to Satan's Lies and instead listen to the Savior?

• Spend our time and energy doing the things that help us feel the Spirit on a consistent basis. He is the real "JUDGE" to help us listen to the right voice.  This includes all of the "Sunday School answers" like pray, scripture study, and church attendance.

• Pray for DISCERNMENT specifically and often - that we can see ourselves the way the Lord does. Pray for EACH OTHER -- especially your fellow sisters in the gospel  Pray that they see themselves more positively.

• Remind each other! When we hear each other saying negative things about themselves, maybe say..."Oh, none of that. Give yourself a pat on the back this time, you are amazing!"

• Take the time each week during the sacrament to pay attention to the right voice to guide you in your focus to overcome weaknesses. What a perfect time and place to renew that covenant with the Lord and aligning to His plans for you!

• EVALUATE OUR PROMPTINGS CAREFULLY (Guilt vs. Shame)  If we're doing something that goes against the Lord's commandments for us then the Spirit can tell us to change -- but the Spirit is never going to make us feel bad about ourselves for things that aren't spiritually important for ourselves or others. President Coe talked about this at the Adult Session of stake conference last week when he talked about Guilt versus Shame.  He taught that we need to evaluate what things in our life give us a sense of guilt -- what things make us feel the euphoria of confidence in the Lord -- and what things make us feel shameful and alone. He taught that the Lord, even when He shows us our faults, always uses a spirit of Hope. We need to focus on listening to the promptings to change that bring us the Lord's confidence and to avoid the voices that pull us into shame and isolation.

Start Today: Listen to the RIGHT Voice! 

True joy, the elusive thing we are all searching for, comes only through a firsthand, personal, intimate daily relationship with Jesus Christ–this is our goal. Don't let Satan's lies keep you from Him.

Quote: Don’t let fear of failure discourage you. Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you—whether that voice comes from the outside or the inside. -Dieter F. Uchtdorf

  

You are each amazing women, and I hope that the point of this lesson resonates with our gospel knowledge that we are divine daughters of God.  We are great as we are... with make-up, without make-up, with enough money, without enough money, with a dirty kitchen or a burnt dinner or a gift someone doesn't want....the Lord sees us as amazing and "good enough" because we are HIS, and He made us!  I know that someday we are going to be blown away when we realize what He sees as really important, because I have seen that in you. The service you all give so readily, the comfort to those in need, the ministering to your visiting teaching sisters....YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!!!!  Please start recognizing that in your lives.  Please give yourself the same benefit of the doubt that the Lord expects us to give each other.  And you will find, in humility with the Spirit this truth-- you are the Lord's creation that you are often throwing darts at.  You are HIS, and the great things you do are gifts from him.  Don't throw mud on His masterpiece.

And if you need help reminding yourself what the RIGHT voice sounds like, it will sound something like this:

You are a DAUGHTER of God.  You are his child!  He loves you unconditionally. He knows your individual potential and progress. He does not rank you or compare you with anyone else. He KNOWS you're not perfect, yet he is proud of your righteous desires!

And above all remind yourself that no mistake, no weakness, no past behavior or trial is outside of the healing and redemptive power of the Atonement. His grace is sufficient to make you whole.  And we need to bear testimony to that truth by how we treat and think about ourselves everyday.

Here is the video we didn't get time to watch, because we were too busy eating cheesecake. Enjoy watching, and remember that each of us are individuals and that we are HIS daughters!

Mormon Messages: Daughter of God Video (2 minutes)

What's this about wearing pants to church?

Maybe you've seen something on your social media networks about this call to wear pants to church tomorrow.

I caught wind of it on Twitter and decided to do some reading, to get me some "edumacation."

Mormon Women Declare “Wear Pants to Church Day” December 16
"A new Mormon feminist organization called “All Enlisted” has declared Sunday, December 16 “Wear Pants to Church Day”—an event conceived as an expression of Mormon feminist visibility and solidarity and a gentle challenge to traditional gender inequalities in Mormonism."

Ask a Feminist: What do you feel is unequal in the church?
"I recognize that some of these issues are church wide, some local, and some unchangeable. Some of them are simple and some of them are deeply ingrained. All of them, nevertheless, make me feel unequal and are worth talking about." See article for full list.

The Worst Thing Is Pants
The Worst Thing Is Pants, Part II
"It's about our hearts. It's not about the pants."

Wearing Pants
"What I am doing is listening to other women’s stories about how they feel at church, and telling my own. It means that I’m participating in discussions and thought experiments that analyze cultural and institutional problems and explore possibilities to change things for the better."

Mormon women plan 'Wear Pants to Church Day’, Salt Lake Tribune

Mormon women wearing pants love the gospel, Washington Post

Poll: Pants in church? Who cares?, Utah Daily Herald

Hmm, food for thought. Hope you were able to see several points of view, before making a judgement.

In my view:
It's not really about pants vs. dresses, is it.

It's about inclusion..."I see you." "I hear you."

It's about opening our eyes, asking questions, having conversations.

It's about breaking down cultural traditions that make others feel unequal. Whether or not you are bothered by the inequities in our Mormon culture, some are. Those inequities do exist, more or less, in our wards and stakes.

It's not about choosing sides. It's about making church life better for all women.

It's influence and persuasion to make things better, to improve a lay church with lay leaders, to seek for a broader view and more awareness.

It's about having a voice and being heard, or maybe just listening and supporting those that do speak up.

It's about caring for the welfare of our souls. (Words of wisdom. Thanks A.!)

It's about lifting all.

A rising tide lifts all boats.

e

Lesson recap: Advancing the work of the Lord

I taught the lesson today. It's George Albert Smith, Lesson 15, Advancing the work of the Lord. Here is part of what we discussed. Do read the whole lesson when you get a minute.

God directs His work, and He calls upon every member of the Church to participate in moving it forward. 

We are doing so much. Besides missionary work, think of all the ways we as women advance the work of the Lord...visiting teaching, callings, service, family history, temple work, teaching our families and other youth, feeding folks, nurturing others, and the list goes on. Every family prayer, every family home evening, every simple act of kindness, every Sunday at church, every session of scripture study is advancing the the work of the the Lord. Let's pat ourselves on the back and acknowledge the good work we women do in the church.

It's a cooperative work. Let's see our work as a cooperative one with our brothers in the gospel. Every calling in the church is a service calling where hierarchy plays no part. Neylan Mcbaine reminds us:

You are needed. You matter. You have a purpose. Your opinions matter. Not just at home behind closed doors, not just with our children, as essential as those influences are, but also in the broadest context of the Lord’s kingdom.

We women need to do a better job of claiming the power and direct access that comes from being a child of God and realizing that power in the choices we make in our own lives. Ours is not a gospel of limitation; it is a gospel of empowerment to get the education we want, pursue our dreams, work in partnerships with spouses and friends to raise families, contribute to our communities as our talents dictate, and seek out answers to our deepest questions without intermediaries.

Inventions of our day are blessings. George Albert Smith embraced technology to do the Lord's work. 

While the first half of the 20th century saw significant challenges (WWI, WWII, the Great Depression), it also brought new technologies that President Smith believed would further the Lord’s work. He was a strong proponent of the aviation industry and saw it as a way to fulfill his travel assignments as a General Authority more efficiently. He also supported the Church’s use of radio and television to take the word of the Lord to a broader audience.

“We ought to regard these [inventions] as blessings from the Lord,” he said. “They greatly enlarge our abilities. They can indeed become blessings if we utilize them in righteousness for the dissemination of truth and the furtherance of the work of the Lord among men. The great challenge facing the world today lies in the use we make of many of these inventions. We can use them to destroy, as we have sometimes done in the past, or we can utilize them to enlighten and bless mankind, as our Heavenly Father would have us do."

Are there ways we can use the technology of today in good ways to do the Lord's work?

Air travel, radio, TV, internet, social media (Facebook, Twitter, Mormon.org, YouTube), smart phones, texting or e-mails, blogging about your faith and your family, crowdsourcing at The Vineyard (indexing, submitting photos, tagging photos) or LDS Tech. While most of these can be used for evil or to destroy let's focus instead on using them to build the kingdom in positive ways.

There is ample opportunity for every member to participate in the work of the Lord.

The responsibility for the conduct of this work does not devolve alone upon [the President of the Church], nor upon his counselors, nor upon the quorum of the Apostles; but it devolves also upon every man and woman who has been baptized by the servants of God and become a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. … We cannot shift the responsibility if we would; our Father has placed it upon our shoulders, and we must round them up and help to carry it off triumphant.

Consider that no one can take your place. This story from Sheri Dew illustrates.  No One Can Take Your Place, page 196-199.)

In 1971 as a shy Freshman at BYU Sister Dew struggled for self-worth. "I wasn't talented enough, thin enough, smart enough, cute enough, or basically anything enough to amount to much." She was homesick and lacked social skills. But she did know how to play basketball.

I had grown up playing basketabll in the great basketball stae of Kansas, and had had some success on the court. More than anything, I wanted to play ball for BYU. So my shyness notwithstanding, I found out where and when team tryouts were being hed and showed up at the gym at a certain hour. but when I pulled open the gym door and peeked inside, a group of girls were already running drills. and they looked good! Clearly, I wasn't in Kansas anymore. Suddenly, every insecure cell in my body began to scream, "What are you thinking? You aren't good enough to play ball here! You can't compete with these girls! What has gotten into your head!" I quickly closed the door and told myself that if I just had a few minutes to regain some composure I would go in. I began to pace up and down the hallway outside that gym, telling myself that at any moment I would go in, I paced and paced...for three hours I paced—until the tryouts were over. I am sorry to say that I never went in.

Now fast foward 30 years. Sister Dew spoke to female athletes at BYU, letting them know she believed they had already accomplished so much. She told this story. Afterwards Dr. Elaine Michaelis approached and said she was the women's basketball coach then, and that it was the only year she had not been able to fill her roster. Her team went that year one girl short.

All the way home Sister Dew stewed. If only she'd had the confidence to try. Maybe she could have made a difference.

The lesson here, from Sheri Dew, is that no one can take your place.

Oh, sure, we have all let others down and watched someone else step in to fill the gap, and we've all at times helped fill in the gap when others have let us down. So yes, it's possible to fill in for someone. But it's not possible to take their place. No now, not ever.

No one can take your place in your family or with your friends. No one can take your place in your ward or your extended family, in your neighborhood or a the company where you work. No one can have the influence you have been prepared to have on all who come within your sphere of influence. Without question, no one can fulfill your foreordained mission. No one can do what you were sent to do. No one.

I think we forget this. Ask the Lord what His will is for you, expect Him to give you the power to carry it out. Know that is may be different for you than the sister sitting next to you. We are here to do our work. And He will give us the power to carry it out.

Doctrine and Covenants 64: 33- 34

 33 Wherefore, be not ^aweary in ^bwell-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of ^csmall things proceedeth that which is great.

 34 Behold, the Lord ^arequireth the ^bheart and a ^cwilling mind; and the willing and ^dobedient shall ^eeat the good of the land of Zion in these last days.

Sisters, it is a great work we are involved in. We can contribute in many ways, both large and small. It's a cooperative work where all hands are needed and appreciated. Blessing await those who are willing and obedient.

Let's do the work in the way women work well...learning, spreading information, tending and befriending, communicating, cooperating, creating community, and seeking balance. These are some ways we can advance the work of the Lord.

e

 

The Secrets of Adulthood

A nice video presentation that gets you thinking about what you've learned as an adult.

The Secrets of Adulthood video

What have you learned as an adult that surprised you?

Loving and Serving Singles

Did you know we have around 37 single sisters in our ward?

In a church that emphasizes family and marriage it surely must be challenging. Below are a series of articles from a single woman in the church writing for Meridian Magazine, that can bring us more understanding.

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Erin Ann McBride, Meridian Magazine, Seven Ways to Better Serve Singles

I can't write the truth about single life as it applies to every person. Everyone is unique, everyone has their own set of standards, and everyone interacts with people differently. But at the same time, there are large, sweeping generalities that hold true across most societies. And how the LDS society views and treats singles is one of those generalities....

Failure #6 - Us against them mentality. The Almighty Marrieds.

I regularly get asked how can “we” minister to the singles better. Every time I hear this I want to stomp a foot. Why? Because it is that “we the marrieds who run this place and know so much more than you” mentality that kills me. The question shouldn't be, “what can WE do to help the singles?” It should be, plain and simple, “what are we not doing to better get to know, and include this left out part of our flock?”

Singles are humans too. Please stop thinking of them as aberrations. We have jobs (hopefully), money problems, personal problems, car troubles, ward callings (hopefully), stress, etc just like everyone else. Stop talking about the one thing you cannot change for them-- whether or not someone else finds them attractive. And start talking about their temporal and spiritual needs.

Solution #6 - Stop treating the singles differently. And stop identifying them by their marital status. Identify them for who they really are.

Read the whole article to find out what the other 6 ways are.

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Erin Ann McBride, Meridian Magazine, I'm single. I'm happy. And you can be too.

To find happiness and contentment in our lives, no matter our situation, is often the ultimate challenge. Whether it be the family dealing with financial downturn, or an infertile couple longing for a child, or the desperate desire to find love and a mate, the challenge is to find “joy in the journey,” even when the journey is not the one we expected or wanted to take.

...Being single is not a limitation or condemnation. It is the opportunity to expand and do more, while living a Gospel-centered life. Marriage does not solve any one’s problems. Marriage alone will not make you happy. You must be happy with who you are above all else. Find joy in your journey!  

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Erin Ann McBride, Meridian Magazine, Fitting in When You’re a Single Square Peg in a Round Hole Made for Two.

How sad is it that the majority of people have never bothered to read the 97 columns obviously written for singles. We all know why they haven't done it- they aren't single. It didn't apply to them. Why should they bother?

And yet the majority of these people think that singles need to buck up and involve themselves more in activities and lessons not geared towards them.

So today we return to our regularly scheduled programming, and speak directly to the singles.

How can we better involve ourselves? How can we fit in and find happiness as a square peg in a round hole?

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Why Some Single LDS Men Stay That Way: Their Frank Opinions

Women, listen up. We're going to let the men do the talking today. Find out how LDS single men answered these questions:

- What is your chief complaint about LDS single women over 30?
- What is the one thing you would like to change about LDS single women over 30?
- Do you find that LDS single women over 30 expect too much from men?
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I've learned a lot from reading these articles. Not that I won't put my foot in my mouth now and then. Yet I think we can all do a little better with understanding each other and our individual circumstances and we can all be a little more sensitive to that.

e

More articles by Erin Ann McBride 


Photo credit

"Why I can't stop reading Mormon housewife blogs"

Emily Flinders found  a great article about non-members who love reading blogs written by Mormon housewifes.  It may be interesting to all you bloggers!  Check it out here.

Lesson Recap: Ward Conference

Today in Relief Society we heard from President Coe, President Brenda Hymas and President Lona Engle of the Stake Young Women and Relief Society presidencies. Here are a few of their thoughts.

Ministering

President Coe spoke about Minster vs. Ministry. The first is about keys of the priesthood, the other is about love. All are called to the ministry.

What does it take to minister to others? Desire, inspiration from the Spirit, and acting right away on that thought and inspiration.

We learn from Ephesians 4: 26-32 that it matters day to day what you say, how you feel, the forgiveness you proffer, the kindness that edifies. These are all things we can do to minister to others.

26  Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
27  Neither give place to the devil.
28  Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.
29  Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.
30  And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
31  Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
32  And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Express love. Speak no evil. Do not judge. Forgive. Don't wait to act.

President Coe ended with this invitation, "Sisters, participate in the ministry. It is your right to do so."

Spiritual Independence

President Hymas compared spiritual independence to teaching her daughter to drive. There were manuals to read, and classes to take, but nothing could replace the experience she needed of actually driving, to discover for herself how to brake and accelerate and stay in her lane. This experience is first gained with her parents by her side.

We gain spiritual independence in the same way. The programs in the church guide us, the scriptures instruct us, and it's okay to rely on someone for a time. Eventually we gain independent testimonies after many experiences with the Spirit.

Helaman taught his sons where to get spiritual strength in their lives:

And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall. Helaman 5:12

Spiritual strength built on the rock of our Redeemer ensures that we will be able to weather the big storms or the long drizzling rain.

Truths that unite us
President Engle reminded us of a truth, that our first relationship with each other was as sisters in heaven. We made hard choices to together and taught one another. Today sharing beauty and truth, heart to heart, unites us.

She went on to talk about the truths she had learned in Primary, Young Women (MIA) and Relief Society that unite us regardless of age.

As a child she remembers the truths two missionaries taught her family about the plan of salvation. In Primary the gospel truths are taught in the simple songs that we remember easily, and that reverence is a feeling you have and it's not just holding still.

As Young Women we love being with friends, learning from the example of good leaders and earning that piece of jewelry by setting and achieving goals.

In Relief Society we learn that age doesn't matter, we share common burdens, we share a love for Christ, we're able to talk through our problems together, and that we need each other.

Relief Society is all those things, but more. It's purpose is to increase our faith, strengthen our families and provide relief to those in need. She left us with a promise: If you attend Relief Society you will have a better life.

e